A Letter To The Uninitiated

This image doesn’t really have any meaning for this post, but I liked it.

It’s fun to listen to the guys I work with when I’m riding around with them. It’s fun to talk about women (wahmen for you unhappy folks) and relationships. It’s fun to hear their points of view. It’s fun to watch a guy, not on the internet, but in real life, step on his own dick. Chest Rockwell said it a while ago (and I’m paraphrasing heavily here, apologies, Chest) “All of your knowledge of women is in the abstract.”

It’s fun to watch an early 40-something year old dude squash his own nuts.

What’s even more fun is to show, not tell, not explain, how I view women. It’s fun to see lightbulbs’ go on in his head as he starts to make connections to things that he hasn’t thought about before.

Here’s an example:

“Chris”: I don’t want to “just have sex with a woman, I need a connection to her.”

Me, in my head: (Where have I heard this before? Why is this so familiar? What does this sound like? Who usually says this stuff?)

Me: “You don’t have to commit to them, you don’t have to fuck them, you don’t have to marry them, just enjoy them. Date them.”

“Chris”: “Well, she’s got ABC, and she doesn’t have XYZ.”

Me: “Yeah? So? What did I just say to you?”

And then we got out of the truck, started unloading our equipment, and I saw a woman, whom I would never marry or commit to, but I opened her anyway. Why? Because I would bang her, given a chance. But that’s me.

“Chris” nearly shit himself watching me teasing this total stranger, and she was enjoying it. Did I “get the digits?” Nope. Did it go anywhere? Nope. Did I get laid? Nope. Does it matter? It does not.

All day long we would drive around, doing our jobs and scoping out wandering and walking women. All day long, “Chris” would disqualify her for “reasons.” On the other hand, I would say she was “good enough, would bang.”

All day long, he would pull out his “list” of exclusions. All day long I would say “She got my dick hard, she’s a 10.” (h/t to BullRush.)

“Chris” mentioned to me that he has decided to try out online dating. With his list of requirements and all of his reasons to exclude, do you think he’ll fair well? I don’t. I think he’ll get discouraged and give it up and go back to whatever it is that he does to meet women. Trust me, he’s not doing “cold approach.”

Who do you think is having a great time meeting, dating, and fucking women? Who do you think is sucking at it?

At the time that I’m writing this, I’ve got my belly dancer, I just met a woman that I’ll call my “soccer mom,” (she fucking HATES that) and I have no less than 4 others in the early stages of texting and conversation. Two of them look really promising right now, but we will see. If I can get them off of their asses, off of the couch, and in front of me, their asses are mine.

If you can get beyond your own nose, if you can get beyond your bullshit lists of exclusion and imaginary ideals. If you can just find one or two things that you find attractive about them, you might stand a chance.

Or you can keep finding reasons to exclude them. She’s not a “quality woman.” “She’s not ABC or XYZ.” “She’s too (insert whatever bullshit here.) And you can keep stepping on your own dick. How’s that working out for you, bud?

Or you can decide that she’s “good enough.” At least for that moment. And you can decide that you’re “good enough,” too. At least for that moment. And who knows where you’ll end up?

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