The other day I mentioned a woman that I have been talking to briefly, the lonely bitter Jew.
Now while she has drank all of the Kool-Aid of outrage, something happened to me that I would like to share with you.
I almost blocked her on the app that I met her on and I almost blocked her from texting me, but I didn’t. Hear me out…
While the odds that she and I are ever going to get together and fuck is remote at the absolute best, hear me out.
I stopped investing anything in our interactions and just started saying and doing things to see what would happen. Whether she knows it or not, she has become an experiment with me.
Let me start from where I’m at and what I like and like to do with women.
I like to praise the women I’m with. While I don’t wait on them hand and foot and I definitely don’t pedestalize them, I definitely like to compliment them, praise them, and show them how much they mean to me and how I much I care about them. That’s because that is what I want them to do for me. I don’t want a woman to hover over me, I definitely don’t want them to “mother” me, but I want them to adore me. I want them to show me how much they care for me. I want them to shave my head and neck for me in the shower. I want them to look into my eyes adoringly. I want them to brag about me to their friends and family. I want them to say out-loud, how much they admire me and respect me. I’m not saying that I always get these things, but it’s what I want.
I have realized, yet again, that what I want isn’t necessarily what they want.
My “lonely bitter Jew” doesn’t want adoration and compliments. She wants acid.
She doesn’t want respect, not really, no sir. She wants something caustic.
What I’m talking about here is Asshole Game but dialed way up. I’m not just an asshole with her, I’m damn near downright mean. And she responds to it. There are certain things I will not say or do, just because I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror if I did. I would hate myself if I said or did certain things. Other things though, that’s fair game and open season.
Here’s a recent conversation I had with her, just to give you an idea. Now, I’m sure there are plenty of you out there that would have gone way further or way harsher, but for me, this was an experiment. Remember that this chick has drank all of the Kool-Aid when it comes to outrage and that she is, in fact paranoid:
And that was the extent of the evenings conversation.
The next day though, she was sending me pics of herself, being sweet, asking how my day was going, saying that I looked “yummy,” etc. In short, she was doing all of the things that I want a woman to do for me. The more caustic and callous I got, the sweeter she became.
I have realized for a long time now, but apparently I forgot, that the majority of people walking around in the world, are in fact, masochists. They want to feel the twist of the knife. They want to feel that pain burning through their stomach. They want to feel the prick of the Thorn. They want to suffer. This woman in particular does for sure. This doesn’t make them “bad,” or “broken,” it just makes them who they are. Fortunately for them and for me, I’m a bit of a sadist. I like to turn the thumbscrews. I like to watch them wriggle on the line. I like to see them suffer. At least to some degree.
The more I don’t give a fuck, the more they do. The more I don’t care how things work out, the more they want them to work out. It’s twisted, but it is what it is.
So are the “bitter and lonely Jew” and Rob going to meet up? Who knows? Probably not. I don’t care either way if we do or not. But it’s been fun doing little “experiments” and seeing what happens. I’m not going to lie, it’s been fun turning the knife.