5 Unpleasant Truths – 1

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  1. There is no One. While I’m at it, not only is there no One, but that old saying, “There’s someone out there for everyone?” Yeah, not so much. Don’t count on it.
  2. Looks matter. Yes ladies, I know you know that. Men? Your looks matter too. Maybe not as much as women’s do for us, but they do matter. If you are a fat piece of shit sitting on the couch, guzzling your beer and wolfing down a bag of Cheetos, do you really think Miss Pretty and Petite in the yoga pants is going to want to sit on your face and drink your jizz? She won’t. Why am I harping on this one? Because it’s one thing you have total control over. Your weight and your health is your decision. How good you look in the mirror, or not, is your fault. Fix it. Yes, I know it’s hard. Do it anyway. While I’m at it, fix your wardrobe. Get clothes that fit you. Not too tight, and not hanging around your ass baggy, either. Ladies, same goes for you. You want a fit, trim, and dapper man? You better be bringing your A game. No sweats and hair in a ponytail looking like you are going shopping at Walmart. Stop being lazy. Get your ass in shape as well if you aren’t already there. Your looks are what is most important to a man. Sorry not sorry, but it’s true.
  3. What you do will be thankless and expected of you if you are a man. Don’t bitch about it. Don’t get a martyr complex over it. If you do, you know what you’ll look and sound like? A whiny little bitch. Or a woman. Do you want that? No? Then deal with it. Women don’t care that you cleaned the house, fixed the car, took out the trash, and put in 60 hours at the office. That’s your job. That’s expected of you. It ain’t right, and it ain’t fair, but it is what it is. Which brings me to:
  4. Life isn’t fair. Nope. It’s not. Get over it. Your woman cheated on you? That sucks. Maybe you should have paid more attention to her. You should have been better. Your man left you for another woman? That blows. Maybe you should have fucked him more and sucked his dick more. You should have been better. Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better. (Rollo Tomassi, The Rational Male)
  5. You can either be a victim or you can overcome, but you can’t do both. Right now, in our society, playing the victim card is rewarded and encouraged. It’s also the easy way out. This way, you never have to take responsibility for anything in your life. But you’ll never get better and you’ll never get far. You’ll never get past whatever it is that’s keeping you stuck in place. As an added bonus, when you play the victim card, you’ll get sympathy and kudos. For awhile. Then people will get sick of your shit and start avoiding you. True story.

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My Cats Send Their Regards

Let me tell you a story. It starts everyday when I get home from work. The long haired Maine Coon hybrid, his name is Nermal, is waiting for me, like a dog, at the top of the stairs. He’s so excited to see me. He’ll start crying and meowing as I’m locking up the door. He’ll cry and meow as I’m walking up the stairs. He’ll meow and reach up and put his front paws on my leg as I reach the landing. He wants me to pick him up, which is no little thing, considering he’s about 20 lbs of cat. So I’ll pick him up and carry him into the kitchen and I’ll rub his head as I’m doing it. He’ll push back against my hand and his motor will be running the whole time. His purrs are very loud.

Kubuki, my tuxedo cat, will come out from behind the stereo entertainment system, or out from under the kitchen table, or out from under the couch, where ever she has been hanging out, and she’ll cry and start rubbing up against my legs, begging to be petted.

This routine happens every day. From what the girlfriend tells me, Nermal will start meowing and crying when I leave the house. He’ll either go down the stairs and cry at the door, or he’ll sit on the landing and do it. Apparently he’ll do this for quite some time. My girlfriend has tried to shut him up, distract him, try to get him to come to her during my absence, all to no avail. I guess my cats are devoted to me.

Later in the evening, or during a lazy weekend at home, when ever my girlfriend or I try to sit on the couch with our laptops, the cats come along and want to be front and center. They will sit right on the laptop itself, right while you are typing whatever it is that you are typing. We can push them off and two minutes later, they are back. They will try to force themselves either on us, or in between us while we are relaxing in the living room.

The only “peace” we get from them is when we go to bed at night, and that’s only because the bedroom is a “cat free zone” because we shut the door at night. Even then, Nermal especially, will sit outside the door and do this guttural, weird, “meow howl.” He is going “feral” as I call it. I can open the door and tell him to shut up. That only encourages him. I can use a spray bottle filled with water and hose him down. I’ve done that many many times. All it has done is get him to move out of range. He’s a smart bastard.

What is the point of this story? I’ve realized that I have learned many lessons from my cats. The lesson I’m illustrating here is Persistence. My cats are nothing but persistent. They will have their way eventually. They are pretty patient about it too. Nothing deters them from getting what they want. They want to be on me? It WILL happen. Sooner or later, it will. What does this have to do with anything?

It is about EVERYTHING. Everything you do, you must be persistent. You want to get in better shape because you let yourself go? Persistence. You didn’t get fat overnight, you ain’t gonna lose it overnight either. You want to make more money? Again, persistence. You’re going to have to get up and get your ass out there. You’re going to have to hustle.

Want to start your own business? Persistence again. When you first come up with an idea, it’s awesome. You are full of piss and vinegar, ready to take on the world. You’ve done some research and found something that you would like to do, and so you do it. You build a website, you get your license to do whatever it is that you want to do. You get your tax I.D. You even find some product or service to sell, whatever that is and then…..

Nothing happens. No customers are banging down your door to buy whatever it is that you are offering. So you place some ads, you tweet your shit on twitter, you post on facebook a bunch of times, you take an ad out on Craigslist. And still nothing.

This is where persistence is key. You HAVE to keep going. Otherwise your business will fail before it had a chance, before it even got off the ground. This is the part you DON’T hear about on YouTube videos or on some course that you bought on the internet. This is where it becomes WORK.

Persistence is getting up at o’dark thirty everyday, rain or shine, and going to the gym. Persistence is when you don’t see any results at all, but you keep hammering at it anyway. Persistence is when you have faith that something, sooner or later, will happen. Persistence is when you go out chasing women and you get blown out. And you WILL get blown out. But maybe, just maybe, that next one will say yes to your invitation. You won’t know until you go after it. One thing I do know is if you quit, you WON’T be getting that woman that is right in front of you.

Persistence is getting your ass out of bed every day to go to work. Especially when you don’t want to. Persistence is writing another e-mail, another blog post, making another phone call, crafting another tweet, posting another picture on IG. All when you are the only one that is reading them or looking at them. All when everybody doesn’t read that post, doesn’t answer that call, or hangs up on you.

Persistence is pushing ever forward even when you sometimes want to give up and watch Netflix.

Think about your kids if you got them, or how you may have been as a kid. When you and your family went on a road trip, what did the kids do the most? “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” That was me as a child. I’d say it so much my Dad would get pissed off and say, “Don’t make turn this car around!” And then I would say it again for good measure. That’s persistence.

Look at these two lovelies:

How can I say no to that?

Persistence is work. You have to keep at it everyday. Even when it seems pointless and stupid. Even when you don’t want to. Especially when you don’t want to.

“But I’m tired!” Yeah? Me too. Cry me a river. I’ll get plenty of sleep when I’m dead.

As a final note, my cat’s both sleep with one eye open. There’s a lesson there too, but that’s for another day. 😉

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Beardruff

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Beards. I’ve had one for years. I started out with a goatee, and now I’m sporting the full beard similar to the one in the picture above.

I’ve had some young gentlemen ask me about my beard, specifically how to grow one that is as thick as mine is. Hate to break it to you men, I haven’t found a product or a solution to growing that thick, full beard. Maybe there is a genuine product out there, but I haven’t found one.

What I’ve found is that most of it comes down to genetics and time. Do the men in your family have thick full beards? If so, you’ll have one too. Eventually. That’s where the time part comes in. When I was a teenager, I couldn’t grow a thick, full beard to save my life. I had these patchy spots on my cheeks, somewhat near my chin. My beard was also very scraggly and thin at that time. This went on until I reached my mid to late twenties. At that point, all of the patchy spots grew in, and as time has gone on, the thickness and fullness has truly reached its prime. I’ve even had a guy claim that I have a “magnum opus” beard. No light gets down to the skin, you can’t see my chin and cheeks underneath the hair. I get all sorts of comments and complements on my beard these days, from both men and women alike.

I’m not writing this to brag about my beard, really I’m not. I’m writing it because with having a beard, there are many issues and responsibilities that come with it. My biggest issue has been “Beardruff.” Flaky, dead, dry skin that comes out of the beard and ends up as an unsightly pile of “dust” on your shirt. Like dandruff, beardruff blows.

There is something you can do about it though.

George Bruno over on Youtube created a great video on how to deal with beardruff. Check it out:

He’s really just touching the tip of the iceberg with beard care. Not only is what George talking about great, but there’s more.

You really need a great beard oil. Beard oil will help soften your beard and make it more manageable. It can also help with the itch that you get when growing out your beard.

George turned me on to Kingsmen beard oil. Their Holy Grail beard oil is fantastic. It’s smells amazing and a little goes a long way. A side benefit about this beard oil is that the women enjoy it too. Try it, see what happens. I’m not shitting you.

Beard oil is the first step. After that, you really need a beard balm. Beard balm is great because it further softens your beard and helps bring it under control. My beard used to be all over the place, like it had a mind of its own. With beard balm, that’s no longer an issue. Instead of having this wild rat’s nest hanging on my face, I now have a very manageable and well behaved beard. Kingsmen also make a great beard balm. The Holy Grail beard balm works great. Same great smell as their beard oil. Both are very affordable.

So check it out. Pick some up. Thank me later.

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2016: Before oil and balm
2018 after beard oil and balm