Hello there, Dear Reader. It’s been a minute since I have posted something to you all. What’s been going on in my life? Well, for one, I have been doing fire performances and fire breathing. I have also been performing as a fire safety for some of these same events.

Yes, I’ve become a carny. Fucking carnies. Misfits, freaks, belly dancers, stilt-walkers, jugglers, fire eaters, fire breathers, fire dancers, acrobats, you name it, and I’ve been to several Renaissance Festivals, and it’s only the beginning of June.

That’s me. I’m the Faceless Jester. I don’t talk, so I’m sort of a mime as well. The “scare factor” when it comes to small children and even some adults, is nothing short of amazing. It’s “a little fun, and a little fear.” For whatever odd reason, the people going to these events love this costume and want to take pictures of me. Sometimes they just want a picture of me, sometimes they want a picture of us together. Either way it’s fun. You know you stumbled onto something when the person asking for a picture hands their phone to the belly dancer you are with, and asks them to take the picture.

You would be surprised how few know that there’s “me,” and then there is “The Jester.” I figured that everyone in the “Carny Crew” knew that we were one and the same. We all got a surprise when I found out that wasn’t always the case. I’ll leave the music video that I played a part in for another day.

Anyways, you’re not here for that, not really. You’re here for a “nugget,” a little piece of wisdom, insight, or even a rant. Who am I to not oblige you?

Jack Napier tweeted the first screenshot that I posted. It’s ultimately what got me thinking about what I am now going to write.

I believe it was Rian Stone who first mentioned “narcissistic fantasies,” and that was some time ago. It was all about how guys have these fantasies and “scripts.” I’m sure you know the ones.

“She needs a zero notch count!”

“She needs to be a lady in the streets and a whore in the sheets!”

“She needs to be good with kids and wants to have kids and wants to homeschool them and stay home making waffles and sewing clothes for our seven kids.”

The funny thing is, you can telegraph your fantasy, (and let’s be honest, shall we? It’s just a fantasy) and any woman with a bit of observation and two brain cells, will sell it right back to you. Why would she do that? So that she can get what she wants. Does that make her Lilith, Destroyer of Worlds? No. It makes her human with her own wants and needs.

The problem is, most guys who telegraph these fantasies (and they are fantasies) forget that they are fantasies, and start believing in their own bullshit. You start thinking that the fantasy that you are spewing from your open mouths are real. She’s just giving you what you want.

Is it her fault? I don’t think so. I think it’s yours, because you blindsided yourself with your own bullshit.

Now… Let’s move on a little shall we?

Jack mentioned: “Want to know who your friends are? Try having the hottest girl at the party. You’ll find out REAL quick.”

I’m not throwing shade at Jack. I like to think I know what he meant when he tweeted this.

The thing is, guys are just like women. Or in this case, what I mean is, we are all just people. We have our wants, needs, and desires. We all have an “agenda.” So if that is the case, would you really be surprised to find out that your “buddy” wants to fuck your girl?

The whole “Bro’s before Ho’s” mentality is where most guys fuck it up with other guys. Any guy that tells me, “I would never!” is either straight up lying, or he’s naive and delusional. “I would never!” Until it happens. Whatever “it” is. The truth is, you don’t know what you would do in any given situation until it actually comes up.

Maybe you believe that “you would never,” and in certain circumstances and contexts, you wouldn’t. But there’s always something that would get you eating your words and doing the opposite of what you said you would “never do.”

I tend to look at all of my friends, and in my mind, I say to myself, “they are just humans, with human wants, needs, and desires. They fuck up like humans do, because nobody is perfect. They are going to do what they think serves their best interests.”

And if something arises, I act accordingly. I don’t get butthurt, angry, or bitter if what they do wasn’t something I anticipated. I may cut them out of my life if the offense is egregious enough, but I don’t assume that because I have sort of “loyalty test or expectation,” that they are going to follow it.

Just like women can sell your fantasy back to you, so can men. In fact, when I see a guy posting something about “brotherhood and loyalty,” I know where his blindspot is. I could sell it back to him if I was so inclined.

Does this mean that you should “trust no one?” I don’t think so. It’s more about don’t put “anything past anyone.” You can still have your friends, you can still have your women or woman, but don’t put anything past anyone.

If you think what I’m saying is negative, jaded, or cynical, then you missed the point. In fact, I would say that you are still hanging onto your fantasy. You’re “doubling down” on it. That’s where cynicism and bitterness comes from. Read those last couple of sentences again.

Could your childhood best friend fuck you over and fuck your girl? Yes. Will he? Maybe. Maybe not.

Could your girl “branch swing” to another guy? Yes. Will she? Maybe. Maybe not.

Their actions will tell you everything you need to know so that you can act accordingly. Don’t let your narcissistic fantasies get in the way.

Let’s take a gander at a clip that is going around on the internet at the moment. Don’t worry, I cut it to the important part, the lesson for you, the watcher.

“Everything I told you in that pod..was real.”

When a woman tells me she loves me, I believe it. Why? Because at the time she is telling me that, she believes it. I know that I could hook her up to a polygraph machine and “no lie detected” would come out the other end. It’s because in that moment, at that time, it was the truth. “Her truth,” if you will.

That is why I added the screenshot at the beginning of this post. Nick August laughed and said, “I meant it when I said it.” And that is exactly what I’m writing about and it’s exactly what that video clip that I shortened up is about. You’ll notice I added my own two cents to Nick’s original tweet.

“For now.” “Right now.”

“I love you, Rob. (Right now.)”

“I want to spend time with you, Rob. (For now.)”

“You are the guy I have been looking for my entire life, Rob. (Right now and for now.)”

I have said it before in the past, there’s no permanency.

When you can internalize that the woman in front of you, telling you that she wants to marry you and that she wants to be with you for the rest of her life, is telling you the truth right in the moment, but that’s no guarantee of tomorrow, or the next day, let alone the rest of your life, and you can be okay with knowing that what she means is “right now,” then you’ll be fine.

You’ll really understand the phrase, “She’s Not Yours, It’s Just Your Turn.”

When I first encountered that phrase, it was a hard, bitter pill to swallow. That’s because I was still stuck on the idea of permanency. I also assumed incorrectly, that when a woman would tell me something, I took it at face value like a man does when speaking to another man. If I tell you something, I mean it, and I don’t just mean it for the moment that it came from my lips. If and when I give my “word,” it’s my bond. You can count on it and take it to the bank. Women don’t operate like that. It doesn’t mean that they are liars and are completely untrustworthy, it just means that you need to take what they say with a grain of salt most of the time.

When you figure out, “she’s not yours, it’s just your turn,” and you realize that there truly is no permanency, and you then realize that “there’s always another woman,” you get to do pretty much whatever you want. It’ll “set you free.” You won’t be angry about it, you won’t be bitter about it, and you’ll realize that none of it matters for the most part, and you’ll be able to enjoy yourself and the people around you, in that moment.