She Might Be Crazy

black and white person feeling smiling
She Could Be Just Like This. Or Worse.

I got asked a question a little while ago about “crazy women.”

Specifically, the question that was asked was, “What are some of the signs, or red flags, of crazy? How do you spot it?”

Since I’ve had plenty of experience with crazy (hell I married it) let me give you a few examples of what to watch out for.

This list is by no means exhaustive and all-inclusive.

Also, your experiences may differ, and your mileage may vary.

Here we go:

1. She’s highly sexual with you early on in the relationship. I’m talking same day lay or next meeting type of stuff. She’ll fuck you like a porn star and will do all sorts of depraved shit with you and for you. Pretty much whatever fantasies you have, she’ll have either done it, or will be down to do it, no problem. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, in and of itself, but it is a warning sign that she is potentially crazy and it could be seen as a red flag. Remember, it’s okay to screw crazy, don’t commit or marry crazy. Do I have to tell you to use protection? This is the type of woman who could have a “pregnancy scare” or could give you a disease as well. Keep that in mind.

2. She talks down about herself. She’ll say things like, “she’s hard to love,” “she’s getting her shit together (she’s not),” she’s “cute but psycho,” and the list goes on. If she speaks negatively about herself, that is a HUGE red flag. She not just fishing for sympathy (she is, but there is more to it, and I’ll come back to this one later), she’s TELLING YOU WHO SHE IS. She’s speaking her truth.

3. She talks “entitlement.” She says she’s a princess. She says she’s high maintenance. She says she’s done criminal acts or morally questionable things and isn’t ashamed of it, she’s actually proud of it? These are all red flags.

4. She’s got a ton of piercings and/or tattoos. She’s got a ton of issues and emotional problems. Even one tattoo is questionable to me. Don’t get me wrong, I like tattoos and I have quite a few myself, but on a woman? Tread carefully. My ex-wife had a bunch when I met her and she got many many more during our marriage. She has more than I do.

5. She dyes her hair unnatural colors. She shaves the side of her head . Tread lightly.

6. The biggest one of all though, in my experience, is that she seeks SYMPATHY. She plays the victim card to the hilt. With my ex-wife, nothing was ever her fault. It was always someone else’s fault. And that included me. It was always “Poor Jen.” And she would always be confused and hurt when someone (me) called her out on her bullshit. Guys, I believe this is the biggest one of them all. I can’t remember where I saw the literature, but in it it said that people who are sociopaths seek sympathy over all the other stuff that I mentioned. It’s like sympathy is their drug. Actually it’s how they hook you in and then take over your life and ruin it completely. Be very careful if you are dealing with a woman who is constantly seeking sympathy and is playing the victim card. This one is a predator. She’ll play the “damsel in distress” and then eat you alive when she is either done with you, or if she can’t get her way.

Use your better judgment when dealing with crazy. You WILL run into it eventually, it’s just a matter of time and odds. Don’t get me wrong, sex with crazy can be some of the best sex you will ever have in your life. But don’t commit to it and definitely don’t marry it. In all honesty, I would avoid it.

You may think you can handle crazy, but you probably can’t. I thought I could, but I couldn’t and didn’t. I just got lucky that I got out when I did and I didn’t lose my life, my ass, or my livelihood when I did get out. I really did just get lucky.

There’s plenty of women out there that aren’t crazy, seek them out instead. You’ll be better off in the long run. As Rich Cooper says, “the juice isn’t worth the squeeze.”

 

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The State Of Men Today: An Observation

man in the middle of the road

I was at a convenience store the other day, buying some fuel for the work truck (the fuel card reader at the pump was down so I had to go inside to pay) and I noticed that the majority of the people who were patronizing the store were men.

This was the first time I’ve stepped into a convenience store in some time and I was saddened by what I saw. The men in this store, and there was about 20 or so of them, were utterly lost.

They had this vacancy in their eyes. Now maybe part of it was the fact that it was 7:30 in the morning. Maybe these guys hadn’t had their morning coffee yet. I doubt it though. They seemed “awake” enough. They could pay for their coffee, their breakfast whatever, their smokes, and their fuel.

They were utterly lost. They looked it. Lifeless eyes. Confused. Like they didn’t know what they were doing there, or how they had gotten there.

I’ve noticed this same confusion and vacancy elsewhere too. I’ve seen it while out on route, all throughout the day. Guys just sort of shuffling around, wandering, waiting. Waiting for what though?

In some cases, some of these guys were waiting for their women to tell them what to do. I saw that as well. Women running the show. Women leading the men around. Women catering to these men like they were either small children or invalids. Guys who have these confused looks on their faces, their eyes dull. “Dance for me puppet, dance. Be a good little boy and you’ll get a new toy.”

Until their women compliment them or “give them a treat.” Then the guy’s face gets animated, his eyes light up. He seems somewhat alive, for a moment at least.

I saw a guy today in a woman’s care facility holding the baby and the baby carrier, being a good boy. He still looked lost. His smile didn’t mask his confusion, “How the fuck did I get here?”

And not just how did he get “here,” as in the facility, but how did he get “here,” as in his life?

How did they get like this? I’m pondering this as I write about it. How indeed did “we” get here, as a group?

What happened?

This is the “matrix” that we all allude to when we talk about the Red Pill. This is the world we inhabit, but don’t necessarily live in.

What a sad state of affairs. What a state that we as a whole, live in.

I pity these guys somewhat. Maybe I sound like an asshole when I say that, but I do. I do pity them. I’m not trying to sound holier than thou, believe me.

I do feel some compassion for them as well. Unplugging is hard to do and is near impossible until you are ready and willing to do it.

Most of these men are not only lost souls, but they are truly lost, at least until the time comes, if the time comes, that they want to unplug.

It seems to me that years ago, we as men were lost, just the same as today, but there is a difference that I’m noticing now. “Back in the day,” men were lost, but many of them seemed genuinely happy in their lost state. Full of ignorant bliss I guess.

Nowadays, more often than not, that blissful ignorance is gone. It’s like they know something is wrong, dreadfully wrong, but they don’t know just what it is. Something is off. You can see it in their eyes and in their faces. The happiness is gone and all that is left is confusion, sadness, a questioning glance here and there, and a look of terror.

Lost Boys indeed.

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You Dodged A Bullet

ammunition brass bullets cartridges

It’s been a little over a month since my ex-girlfriend moved out. I’ll be completely honest, I miss her terribly sometimes. I miss what we could have had, and what we did have. I miss her company. I miss seeing her smiling face and hearing her laugh. I miss her body. I miss having her lying next to me in bed at night and waking up to see her in the morning.

Maybe I have a small touch of Oneitis. I wouldn’t doubt that. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have any delusions that she was ever my “soulmate.” I don’t have the scarcity mentality that “I’ll never love again.” But every once in a while, damn, I sure do miss her.

She was the youngest, most fit, and most attractive woman that I’ve had so far in my life. She put the past women to shame. There will be other women, I know this. But at this moment that I’m typing this, it doesn’t seem like it. It doesn’t seem like there will be another “younger, hotter, tighter.” There will be, I know it. It just doesn’t seem like that right now. I’ll get there though.

Here’s something I did think about though:

Maybe I dodged a bullet. You see, my ex-gf snowballed me when we broke up. I really had no idea that it was coming. Maybe us breaking up was a good thing.

A couple of months before we broke up, we had talked about a future where there would have been marriage and most likely some children. I’m old enough at this point that I was good with the idea that I would never be a father, but then we talked about it, seriously. I realized that not only was the idea okay, it actually appealed to me. I got excited about the idea of being a father. I got excited about the idea of raising children and being called “Dad.”

Now that’s not going to happen. At least not with her anyways. Perhaps it won’t happen at all. I don’t know how I feel about that.

Maybe I dodged a bullet because we could have gotten married and had children and she could have snowballed me then, and either left me raising children by myself, or even worse, she could have gotten custody of my children and then I’m left doing what a lot of Men are doing these days: Working themselves into an early grave to provide for their children that they don’t get to see as often as they would like to. Having another man raising and/or influencing their children in ways that may not be how he, as the father, would want his children raised. Paying alimony.

I could sit here and lament the relationship that ended. I could lament how it didn’t work out the way that I had hoped it would. I could pine over her. I could torture myself in a thousand different ways by playing the “coulda, woulda, shoulda” game. I could go over all of this for the millionth time in my head and try to wrap myself around it. And still come up short on answers that satisfy me.

Or I could look at it as I dodged a bullet. Better now that all of the things that happened, happened. Better now that they happened rather than 5 years down the road. Better they happened before we ever talked about setting a wedding date and started actually having children.

If you are a Man and you’re reading this right now, and you’re dealing with a divorce, a break up, a loss of a relationship, maybe you too, dodged a bullet.

 

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