The Hardest Red Pill Truth I’ve Had To Swallow So Far

A woman never belongs to you, it’s just your turn. – Donovan Sharpe

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Does a man ever truly finish unplugging? Is there a final destination to this journey? I don’t know.

I do know that one of the hardest truths that I’ve had the hardest time with is the one that I quoted above. A woman never belongs to you, it’s just your turn. The old blue pill me bought the lie that I could somehow “own” or “possess” a woman. That she would be mine. Never mind the part about sliding into marital bliss and having the burden of performance removed. I’ve never bought into the bliss thing, and I don’t mind the burden of performance. As far as I’m concerned, the burden of performance isn’t really that big of a burden to me, since all the shit I do now is for me, not for someone else. The burden is on me, for me.

I understand now that men are the romantics and the idealists. We are the one’s who would sacrifice our everything for a woman, including our lives. It just sucks to know, really know, that she isn’t capable of doing that for us, or in this case, for me. The possibility that she will walk at a moment’s notice because she perceives that she has found “something better,” is a constant blip on my radar. It plays in the background with every interaction I have. It’s a constant reminder of when Hypergamy rears it’s ugly head, and of course, that there is no such thing as relational equity.

I admit, I’ve struggled with a lot that the red pill has offered me, but this one right now has been the hardest. Do you go all MGTOW and say fuck them all, I want nothing to do with them? I could. But I won’t.

Do I just spin plates for the rest of my life? That’s a possibility.

Do I get more seriously involved with just one, knowing that I’m not her first (for anything really) and that I definitely won’t be her last?

One thing I can say about this last one is this:

While you may go, beautiful woman, and it’ll probably hurt a lot when you go, I’ll enjoy watching your ass move as you walk away.

Thanks for the good times and the memories.

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A Quote from The Circus of Dr. Lao

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“Tomorrow will be like today, and the day after tomorrow will be like day before yesterday,” said Apollonius. “I see your remaining days each as quiet, tedious collections of hours. You will not travel anywhere. You will think no new thoughts. You will experience no new passions. Older you will become but not wiser. Stiffer but not more dignified. Childless you are, and childless you shall remain. Of that suppleness you once commanded in your youth, of that strange simplicity which once attracted a few men to you, neither endures, nor shall you recapture any of them anymore. People will talk to you and visit with you out of sentiment or pity, not because you have anything to offer them. Have you ever seen an old cornstalk turning brown, dying, but refusing to fall over, upon which stray birds alight now and then, hardly remarking what it is they perch on? That is you. I cannot fathom your place in life’s economy. A living thing should either create or destroy according to its capacity and caprice, but you, you do neither. You only live on dreaming of the nice things you would like to have happen to you but which never happen; and you wonder vaguely why the young lives about you which you occasionally chide for a fancied impropriety never listen to you and seem to flee at your approach. When you die you will be buried and forgotten and that is all. The morticians will enclose you in a worm-proof casket, thus sealing even unto eternity the clay of your uselessness. And for all the good or evil, creation or destruction, that your living might have accomplished, you might just as well has never lived at all. I cannot see the purpose in such a life. I can see in it only vulgar, shocking waste.”
Charles G. Finney, The Circus of Dr. Lao

I’ve been in the Tarot business for a long time. Most of my clients want smoke and sunshine blown up their asses. They want to blame fate, karma, god, the universe, and everybody else for their situations. They want things to fall into place without having to do anything about it. They want it all and they want it now. And they wanted it handed to them on a silver platter with a silver spoon. Reality doesn’t work that way, the world doesn’t owe you anything. You have to work for it. You have to make sacrifices, and you have to be able to perform. It also doesn’t hurt if you know people.

When I found this quote, it is what the TRUE reality is for most people. I’m going to print it out on business cards and hand them out. I want to tell people, “Here. Here is your real fate. This is going to be you, unless you truly want to do something about it, instead of hoping and praying, blaming karma, god, or anyone else for where you are at. You got yourself there, one way or another. It’s up to you to get yourself out.”

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