I mostly talk with Rian, Jack, the Let Em Burn crew, and a few folks from the Married Red Pill. That’s a very small group of folks that are part of a much larger group of guys talking about (broadly) men’s issues. But the more I hear about the others, the more I don’t want to know what they’re about. In a very fundamental way, they don’t get it. They don’t get it, or they’ve forgotten it. They don’t get why so many men flock to the internet every day and discover this space. After watching all the red meat online, somewhere along the way, they’ve put the focus on whamen behaving badly, whamen getting their comeuppance, or dudes being chumps, or society breaking the backs of men, and have forgotten about themselves.

I’ve been here way too long. While complying with my government’s rules to stay at home for two years, I’ve preoccupied my time devouring Red Pill material. Once I’ve gotten fed up and left the house, I’ve done the approaches, got the dating apps, and eventually got laid. But in the middle of it all, I had to be called aside and asked, “Dante, you’re doing all this, what is it you actually want?”. This question rocked me to my core, because I spent so much time and energy doing shit, not realizing that I was actually lost. It took me several months, but since then I’ve come up with my answer. And to my surprise, it’s an answer that I think everyone in this space had at one point, but forgotten. So to save you the time, here’s my answer and, most likely, the reason you’re here. Class is in session.

Men and women, together

Rollo makes the claim that “Men and women are better together than they are apart”. And if you buy evolutionary biology, this is true. Every sexual (with male and female) species is designed to have the two sexes get together and reproduce. If these traits passed down from our evolutionary ancestors to present day you, it’s most likely that you are evolutionarily programmed to have the opposite sex in your life too. By being human (not me, I’m a panda), you are programmed to get women, fuck them, and be in their company. If you can’t accept this, stop and don’t go any further. We’re never going to agree on the succeeding paragraphs.

One key idea I found in Ian Ironwood’s writings (I’m summarizing and extending his thoughts here) is that men have an impetus for individual sovereignty, while women have an impetus for social harmony. From a sociological standpoint, having both in your court is highly advantageous. Without individual sovereignty, you cannot go after your wants and desires. Without social harmony, almost everyone would be dead. The most successful strategy therefore is to build a society whose foundation is a social harmony built on protecting individual sovereignty — men and women together.

Another example from personal experience: I remember when my sister and I were little, she’d clutch my arm when we cross the street and have her anxiety about getting hit by an oncoming car depend upon me for emotional support. The mundane experience of crossing the street became more exciting for me. Instead of me just getting to where I have to go, it became a game of “don’t get hit by a car”. And my sister wasn’t doing this deliberately. It was her instinct that drove her to do this, and I benefit from it as a result. There’s something about men that women need, and there is something about women that men need. It just is. Don’t be surprised then that men and women together would mean an increase in happiness overall.

Why this space exists

The early pickup artists were not going around hitting on women because they hated them and wanted to hold them accountable. Quite the contrary. The early red pill guys were not online discussing women’s nature because they wanted to exploit it and harm the women in their lives. Quite the contrary. The early married red pill guys do not talk all day about their wives because they wished she was dead. Quite the contrary. They decided, by dare I say instinct, that not having women/sexual companionship in their lives kinda sucked. This is the very core of it. And everyone talking about men’s issues has become distracted with talking about other things, like holding women accountable, getting back at feminism, posturing on Twitter, etc. This is an absolute tragedy. Because instead of solving this core issue, we’re coping and blaming and proselytizing and grifting.

As a coping strategy came forth the Men’s Right’s Activists – whose sole hope is that the state give them more stuff, the Incel movement – guys who hate women because they themselves lack the skill and courage to talk to them, the original MGTOW movement – guys who once made women the center of their lives and are sick of it, and the Black Pill (MGTOW 2.0) – guys who are looking for a reason to believe that getting a girl is a hopeless endeavor and that we should all give up. Coping strategies that cause general misery. Every guy here at one point did not want to hate women, did not want to fight feminism, didn’t want to blame everything on Biden or anything like that. They wanted to get laid, have girls stick around, and get their marriages right. It’s amazing how the algorithm and Smart TVs have gotten us to change our wants and desires for something that is ultimately against our nature. The modern relationship discourse by both men and women is one of the most toxic spaces to listen to.

But men did not originally come here for this reason. They came here to have a great relationship with the opposite sex.

Conclusion

So what’s in this for you? Ignore 90% of the content out there, and focus on this key idea: how are these tips, tricks, and ideas, helping me build a great interaction with the opposite sex? You will thank yourself for it, and you will realize your life gets better as a result. At least I know it did for me.

Originally posted on Substack.