What Are You Waiting For?

June 25, 2018January 3, 2019 Rob SaysLeave a comment

man in red crew neck sweatshirt photography — What if you gave yourself permission to succeed?

You’ve chosen your direction, you’ve decided where you want to go, you’ve even decided when you want to go. And yet, you still stall and stay put.

What’s stopping you? Whose permission are you waiting on?

Mom and Dad? Your boss? Your significant other? Who?

If you are sitting around waiting for someone to give you permission, I’ve got news for you.

You’ll be waiting a long time before that permission is granted. If ever.

What if the permission you’ve been waiting around for is only available from you? What would happen if you gave yourself permission to do whatever it is that you want to do? What would happen?

Do you think you would be able to go on with your life and do the things you want? Do you think you would be able to say the things you want? Do you think you just might have the relationships, both intimate and platonic, that you want?

Sitting around waiting for permission. Do you realize that you could sit around your entire life waiting for that permission? And it never comes?

Stop waiting around for someone else’s permission. If you have to ask someone else, the answer is usually going to be NO.

When I started this blog back in late 2016, I didn’t really give myself permission to do what I’m doing now. I didn’t take the blog seriously. I didn’t know for sure what direction that I was going to go. I hid behind an avatar and tried to stay as anonymous as possible about it.

I hid it from my friends, family, co-workers, everybody. Even myself at some times.

All through 2017 I was sporadic with posting on this blog. I would go months and months without posting a single thing, and then I would have a flurry of activity for a month or so, only to go back to nothing on end for a longer time period.

It wasn’t until late January of this year, 2018, that I decided to get serious about my blog. I decided I was going to post at least once a week. So I started doing that. I gave myself permission. I soon realized that I enjoyed what I was doing and that it was starting to create a response, so I upped it to twice a week. I gave myself permission to do that.

I then decided to change things up on Twitter. When I first started my Twitter account, it was an anonymous account with an anonymous avatar. Mostly I just trolled people and surfed nonsense. Most of the people I followed at that time had nothing of value to offer to me, and the same could be said of me to them.

I changed that up in February of this year and decided to go with my own name and changed my avatar to an actual picture of me. I dumped almost my entire list of who I was following and started over. Best decision I could have made. I gave myself permission.

The blog started getting some decent traffic on its own, I started following some really interesting and influential people on Twitter and things started to get clearer for me.

I gave myself permission to be me and start saying the things that I needed to say. And people started responding.

My Twitter feed is full of value now. I enjoy getting on and seeing what is going on there. I’m having conversations of impact with men and women that I respect. I’m learning things about myself, about them, and about life in general. I gave myself permission to have all of this.

I decided at the end of March of this year to start an e-mail list. I wanted to be able to interact with more people on a more personal level. To be able to share even more intimately than I do on this blog. Best decision I’ve made to date on that one. When I first started the e-mail list, I figured I would have it be a weekly or bi-weekly thing. That lasted a whole two weeks. Then I decided to make it a daily thing. From that time forward, I haven’t missed a single day of sending out something to my list.

That list continues to grow. My subscribers have become even more engaged with me. Man, it’s been awesome.

I was worried initially that doing a daily e-mail would be too annoying and spammy. Then I decided to hell with it, gave myself permission to do it anyway, and now I’m doing it.

Then I decided to resurrect my YouTube channel. I decided to start creating content there as well as here on my blog and on my e-mail list. I gave myself permission to do that as well.

My subscriber count there is nothing to brag about, but it’s starting to grow there as well. And I’m grateful for those that have subscribed, it tells me that they are finding something of value there as well.

I wondered and worried for a minute that I would run out of time, or worse that I would run out of things to say on all my different platforms. So far that hasn’t happened. I make the time to say the things I want to say for each platform that I want to say it on and I give myself permission to not worry so much about what I’m going to say.

Giving myself permission to not worry about what I’m going to say next has been huge. Now things show up. Sometimes I feel like I’m talking out my ass, not sure where I’m going to go with it, and that’s okay. It ends up going where it needs to go. I gave myself permission to let it go where ever it needs to go and let it end up being what it needs to be.

If I can do all of this while holding down a full time job with 50 hour workweeks sometimes, a part time side gig, a full time live-in relationship that just keeps getting better and better, and still find time to do stuff just for me, as well as doing a decent amount of self care and getting enough sleep, what do you think would be possible for you if you just gave yourself permission to do it?

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What Example Are You Setting?

June 18, 2018January 3, 2019 Rob SaysLeave a comment

grayscale photo of person s shake hands — One Man Helps Another

We all are just going along, doing our thing, living our lives.

And out of the blue, someone comes along and says, “Love reading your work.”

It stopped me dead in my tracks.

I literally don’t have the words. Other than, “Thank you so much, your words me a lot to me.”

It’s simple things like that, that make me want to be a better man.

You never know who is watching what you do. You never know what example you are setting for someone else. You never know who is looking up to you.

Until something like that happens.

Life is such a dichotomy.

On one hand, no one cares what you do. They aren’t watching, they are too busy being caught up in their own world, doing their own thing.

But on the other hand, they are watching, they do notice, and what you are saying and doing can make a powerful impact.

Keep this dichotomy in mind as you go about your daily life. No one is watching, and yet they are. No one cares, but they do.

Don’t worry about seeking approval, do you. Do your thing. Realize that someone is watching. Someone is learning from you. Someone is exemplifying you. Someone is emulating you. Someone wants to be like you.

Be that role model.

Be you.

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Going “Galt.”

June 11, 2018January 3, 2019 Rob SaysLeave a comment

pink teal yellow multi color please leave nothing but your feet road signage — An Apt Description

What does it mean when you hear, “He’s going Galt?”

Here’s the urban dictionary definition of “Going Galt”:

The conservative version of “I’m movin’ to Canada!” Referring to John Galt from Ayn Rand’s novel “Atlas Shrugged”, Going Galt means leaving what you see as a society crumbling in on itself and going somewhere else to watch it all burn to the ground.

I like that definition.

This last weekend, on Saturday specifically, the girlfriend and I had a yard sale. We got up early on Saturday morning, (well, I got up early. She slept for a couple more hours, but that’s besides the point) and we loaded our two cars up with a bunch of ~~shit~~ stuff that we didn’t need anymore, and took it to ye olde busy street corner to let the gawkers gawk and the haggling begin.

We started our “sale” about 7 am and got done with it by about 11 am. We made a whopping $30 between us. That’s it. Yes I know, unspectacular. I agree.

The whole point of this little show though was to “lighten our load,” or as I like to say, “Let’s get rid of some shit.”

After the yard sale, the remaining ~~shit~~ stuff went to the library and to good will. I’m done packing that shit up and taking it home to store it in the garage, only to drag it back out, take it to the corner yet again, only to not sell much, if anything, than we did the last time we did a yard sale.

Get to the fucking point, Rob.

Alright, fine. It’s this:

Like in the movie Fight Club: “The shit you own ends up owning you.” Or something along those lines.

When you buy stuff, you end up paying for it at least three times.

When you purchased it
When you store it
When you move it

Think of all the money you could save if you didn’t buy that latest whatever the hell it is that is on your television, your e-mail, on Twitter, FB, you name it. Think about the debt you could stay out of if you didn’t buy a bunch of shit.

Think of how much money you could save if you didn’t have to store that shit. I’m not just talking about having a storage unit or something equivalent. I’m talking about the four walls that you reside in and currently call home. The more stuff, the more space you will need to store said stuff. The more space you need, the more expensive that space is going to be.

Think about how much money you would save if you didn’t have to move that stuff around. The more stuff you have, the bigger the vehicle you will need to move that stuff, and the more expensive that vehicle will be.

Think about this one as well:

The more moves you make with all your stuff, the more expense you will incur with each move. Gotta get that truck again. Not to mention the physical cost of picking that stuff up and putting it down each time you move it. (Notice how when you need to move, nobody is able to help, they all have “plans.”)

Getting rid of stuff means less to move, less space to store it, and usually, a smaller space that is less expensive.

And you didn’t even have to get a second job or ask for a raise. Or take out a loan. Or apply for a line of credit. You’re welcome.

Having less means you can live on less. Having less means you don’t “need” to make a bunch of money. Having less money means less taxes. Less taxes means less people are able to live off of you. Less people living off of you (other than those you want to live off of you: spouse, kids, etc.) equals a happier you. At least it does for me anyways.

Do yourself and your family a favor and have a yard sale. Get rid of a bunch of ~~shit~~ stuff that you don’t need and aren’t using anymore.

Pair down. People are always talking about getting lean. While you are working on getting your body lean, why don’t you get your home and stuff lean too?

Less need for money = more freedom.

If you don’t have to work, you can walk from a job that sucks. Financially you’ll be fine.

Pair down on your stuff and find out what you can really live on. You might surprise yourself.

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