Author: Rob Says

A man who loves and likes women.

Priorities

Rob SaysLeave a comment

landscape photography of snowy mountain

Something I realized after I made my prior post, and it deserves a post of its own, so here we are, is that not only do intelligent people tend to focus on more esoteric and obscure topics, they tend to sometimes get “caught up in details” about shit that doesn’t matter.

In many ways, why worry about how and if we will ever “get to Mars and beyond?” Why worry about things like “Saving the West” or “doing it for the elderly/children/future” crowd? When you think about, or at least when I think about it, my elders and ancestors didn’t worry too much about what happened over a hundred years ago, nor did they worry about what was going to happen a hundred years after they were gone. They just worried about what was going on around them in “real time.” They were more concerned with keeping food on the table and keeping the vehicles up and running.

A lot of guys out there that are very intelligent guys are more concerned about “how to get da gurlz” than whatever guy first came up with the first idea of human behavior and why that behavior is. It can be difficult and distracting to wax poetic about the finer points of philosophy when you have a hard dick and no way of getting release besides masturbation.

When I talk about “Let ‘Em Burn,” it’s not only about letting people fail on their own and letting them make their own mistakes, it’s also about figuring out what is important to you. What really matters to you. Figuring out what “is” versus what “ought to be.”

For whatever reason, I personally get more satisfaction for myself and for others when I hear that they figured something out versus all of the detail of how they got there. You got there? Great! I don’t really care how you did it, just that you did. I’m certain that I’m missing something important much of the time when I start to tune out when the details start coming in, but that’s the crux of the matter for me I guess. The devil is always in the details and I don’t like getting bogged down in it unless I’m still trying to figure it out for myself. Once I figure it out I want to move on to the next thing. Dammit, I don’t want to sit around rehashing how I got there.

Maybe this is just my long and rambling way of saying:

Figure out what really matters to you and then do that. Don’t get caught up in all of the details if you can help it. Most of the details aren’t going to reveal themselves until you are “right in the middle of it,” and those details are going to be things that you probably had no idea of what they were or what they were going to be. You can’t plan for everything and you won’t be able to anticipate everything that comes your way. We tend to worry about shit that never happens and we handle whatever it is when it shows up.

A recent example of what I’m trying to convey happened to me over this last weekend.

Friday evening, I was going to hop in my car and get myself something to eat. The place I was going to go to was close, maybe two minutes away. So I grabbed my keys, went out the door, and promptly locked myself out of my house. You see, I grabbed my keys alright, but I grabbed the wrong keys. I grabbed my work keys instead of my house keys and my car keys. I knew it when I went to lock the deadbolt to my house and saw the keys I was holding.

Normally this wouldn’t have been a huge problem except that I had left my phone in the house as well. Since I was only literally going “around the block,” there was no need for me to have my phone on me, except that I did have a need.

Technology is great, but there are certain drawbacks to it as well.

When I was younger, before the day and age of smartphones, I had phone numbers memorized. I still do. I can still pick up a phone and dial my grandmother who has been dead for over five years. I have no idea who has her phone number now, but I could dial it without even thinking about it. Same could be said about several childhood friends phone numbers. I could call them even though they moved away over twenty years ago and they didn’t take their numbers with them.

I couldn’t call my Dad though, and that’s because I don’t have his phone number memorized. My phone has it though and it was currently sitting on my coffee table behind a locked door. Something else that I realized at that time was that even if I had my Dad’s phone number memorized and I went to a neighbor and asked to borrow their phone in order to call him, he was most likely out with his girlfriend and wouldn’t be able to help me at that time.

The only option that I had available to me was to start walking. Two and a half miles later I ended up at my Dad’s house where I could get my spare key to my house. He wasn’t home at the time, of course, but I was able to get the key and then I had to hoof it back to my house, two and a half miles yet again. By the time I got home it was getting dark and turning chilly. I can only imagine what a predicament it would have been had I locked myself out of my house in the dead of winter and me not wearing a coat or jacket.

I had a little over an hour to go over and over in my mind what I need to do in order to not have to walk five miles to get a spare key in the event that I lock myself out of my house again. Walking five miles is doable, but I really don’t want to repeat it. It’s not an ideal “plan b.”

I figured something out that will work for me and I’m in the process of implementing it as I write this. It’s not totally ideal, but it will work. It’s better than walking five miles roundtrip or busting a window to get back into my house. The point is, while I was walking and mulling it over, I wasn’t thinking about “how are we going to get to Mars” or even “how do I get da gurlz?” None of that shit mattered. I barely focused on anything except “What do I do so I don’t have to walk five miles to get a key?”

Small side-note: I’m walking and avoiding getting hit by cars and people were out, not “sheltering in place.” Most of them were hiding behind their car windows and masks. But there were two women that I passed, one of them complimented me on my shirt, and had I not been pressed to get my spare key, I would have stopped and tried to pick at least one of them up. But I had a different urgency at the time and different priorities.

Neither of the women were wearing masks. Apparently they didn’t give a fuck about COVID-19 either. There’s hope for humanity yet.

KISS. Keep It Simple Stupid. Stay in the moment instead of wondering and/or worrying about a bunch of things that ultimately don’t matter, never did, and never will. You can keep distracting yourself with your interpretation of what some dead philosopher said over a hundred years ago, or you can figure out where to stash a key in the event you lock yourself out of your house. You can distract yourself with visions of flight beyond the speed of light, or you can notice that the girl not giving a fuck about a bug is not wearing a mask and she’s smiling at you, and now is your chance Bubba.

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Is Intelligence An Inherently Unattractive Trait?

Rob Says1 Comment

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Someone that follows me sent me the pic above and a question. The question was:

Is intelligence an inherently an unattractive trait? The person also asked me “What is it about the human condition that seems to prefer less over more intelligent males?” They also followed up with a final question, which was “Why does this trait draw backlash, hostility, and resentment from friends, colleagues, and family?”

All of the questions were decent questions and I felt like I wanted to throw my two cents at it, so here it all goes:

First off, the first question is a good one, but it’s the wrong question. Intelligence isn’t an inherently unattractive trait. I can only speak from my own personal experience and also from other men in particular, but women find intelligence attractive. What women and men as well, find unattractive is a lack of “social intelligence,” an understanding of social cues, mores, and graces.

I’ve met people that are “on the spectrum” and have been diagnosed with something like Aspberger’s, where they were complete geniuses when it came to something like mathematics. They could solve the most complex equations in their heads, on the fly, in real time. Yet they had no idea how to relate to another human being. They had no concept of how to have a conversation. They had no social mores, would just blurt things out, and would make other people uncomfortable. Sometimes these individuals even came across as confrontational, even though they weren’t trying to be, and ultimately they would be shunned and avoided.

Social cues and graces can be learned. We usually do it from a young age where we observe our friends and families enteracting with other people in our worlds. Subtlety is key here, and I think that sometimes that subtlety is missed out by the highly intelligent person. They’ve got other things going on in their heads.

Most people that I have encountered that are considered intelligent have little or no understanding of social graces and social cues. I think this is because someone who is considered highly intelligent is usually focusing on other things. They are focusing on questions and ideas that you could consider “bigger picture.” They aren’t concerned with things like “small talk,” or general trivialities. Unfortunately, the average person isn’t usually too concerned with things that they don’t understand, and so they tend to focus on things that they do understand.

The average person tends to have more understanding of social cues and social mores or graces. Especially women. A guy who understands or knows “game,” has an understanding of social cues and social graces. He just “gets it.” People with high intelligence usually miss these social cues and graces or consider them irrelevant and unnecessary. And those cues and graces are unnecessary when you are trying to figure out a way to go beyond the speed of light or figure out a cure for cancer. Ignoring or dismissing those social cues won’t get you laid though.

Johanna Schopenhauer writing to her son in the above graphic, ripped him a new asshole, but it wasn’t because he was highly intelligent. It was because he doesn’t understand social cues. I imagine that Arthur didn’t understand the concept of “active listening,” and that he was merely “waiting for his turn to speak,” if even that. His mother probably saw him time and time again making social faus paux, which most likely embarrassed her, and in her mind, made her look bad, so out of frustration she gave him “both barrels.” I imagine that Arthur probably couldn’t have cared less.

Many highly intelligent people that I have met or talked to are very lonely people. They tend to spend much of their time in some form of isolation or with other highly intelligent people discussing their theories, ideas, and hypotheses. They can’t relate to the “average person.” Talking about what latest celebrity did what, or what the weather is like at the moment, can be a very taxing and dull prospect for someone that is highly intelligent. Many times a highly intelligent person would rather skip the “fluff” and get right down to the “meat and potatoes.” The problem is, the “fluff” is necessary. Talking about the weather and the latest celebrity gossip may seem mundane and boring, but it can be essential. Especially if you want to get laid.

Highly intelligent guys throughout the years have had this conundrum. They realized that something was off because the babes weren’t knocking down their doors to get at them and get their seed. So like any highly intelligent person, they decided that they needed to tackle this problem and so they started trying things out, making notes about their results, comparing those notes with other guys, refining their discoveries, and before you knew it, “game” was born. Think Ross Jefferies, Mystery, Style, etc. As far as I can tell, all these guys were highly intelligent guys, they just had one problem, they couldn’t get laid. Or they couldn’t get laid on a regular basis by the women that they desired. So they went out and started trying things and seeing what results they would get. There’s a ton of literature, blog posts, videos, courses, ad nauseum that covers all of this in more detail than I want, or will go into here. You want more information on that, you’ll have to do the digging yourself.

“Why does this trait draw backlash, etc?” That’s because no one wants to look stupid or like a fool. We resent those who make us look bad. We can be intimidated by someone that seems or is highly intelligent. On the other side of the coin, those who are charming and make us feel like we are the only people in the room will have us eating out of their hands. They are charismatic.  You do that by paying attention to what the other party is saying, actually listening to them instead of just waiting for your turn to speak.

A person who “just gets it,” doesn’t try to outshine or outcompete with others, who pays attention to social cues and graces will be sought out by others. Throw intelligence into the mix, and that person is a rare find. Most women want a man who “just gets it” and is also intelligent to boot. He will be able to find better ways to provision, he’ll be more efficient at doing it most likely as well, and he’ll most likely be able to outdo his competition. What’s not attractive about that?

So in my opinion, it’s not intelligence itself that is inherently unattractive, it’s a lack of understanding of social cues and social graces. It’s the inability or the unwillingness to understand that there are certain “ways” to have conversations with others.

While intelligence may eventually get us to Mars and beyond and it may figure out a cure for all cancers, intelligence alone will probably not get you laid. That’s where learning about social cues and graces comes into play. That’s what is considered being “charming and charismatic.” Ignore and avoid this at your own peril.

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Cracks Along The Edges

Rob Says2 Comments

pink and teal painted surface

A lot of things have happened to me since I first started writing this blog back in October of 2016. For starts, I went from writing a handful of posts that year, to writing two posts per week for almost two years running. I had a live-in girlfriend at the beginning of this blog, to being single now as I write this.

You all got to read in more or less “real time” about my mother being diagnosed with ovarian cancer and her eventual death.

You got to learn about me, my “origin story” as it were, if you followed along with my twice weekly ramblings and rantings. My “story” is sprinkled all throughout my blog. You don’t want to take the time and read through everything I’ve written so far? That’s okay. I created a post for my patrons on Patreon that summarizes it all nicely. It will cost you money though. You want it, you get to pay for it like they did.

I created a newsletter and in the beginning I was writing individual emails every single day. It was great until it wasn’t. That caused me to burnout pretty bad, which is why I use my newsletter now mostly as a way to keep in touch with those that want to stay in touch with me in the event that I get deplatformed. What you are reading here you’ll end up seeing on the newsletter. So subscribe to that if you would like, or don’t. I won’t try and sell some shit from gumroad to you and I won’t sell your email address to spammers, scammers, or other nefarious sorts.

You have seen my beginnings with Masculine Geek here as well. I try and keep most of my stuff collected here as I’ve tried to keep what I do here and what I do there separate. Sometimes I have succeeded admirably in doing this, and in other cases I have failed spectacularly. There’s only so much time in the day and only so much creative juice flowing. I’m finding that out right now.

I’m spreading myself too thin. I’m burning out. There’s “cracks along the edges” in my life. So I’m going to take a break. I’m taking a break from the blog for the time being. I want to get through this whole stupid mess that we are calling “quarantine” before I’ll probably come back on here. My work life right now is demanding a huge amount of my attention and my energy and I’m struggling with coming up with new and witty things to say to you all.

I want to devote more of my time to making and editing videos and doing the “livestream thing.” So that’s what I’m going to do for the foreseeable future. At least until things settle down at work and sort of go back to “normal,” whatever that is.

What can I leave with you for right now?

I’ll leave you with this:

Women are great, but they are just women. They do stupid shit just like we do. They are not the be-all-end-all to life. They are just human beings. I know that may come as a shock for some of you, especially if you are going through a dry spell, or you’re fairly young and somewhat new to dating and relating in the 21st century, but I promise you, they “ain’t all that.”

Spend more of your time working on the things that you are interested in. Whether it’s health, wealth, or learning a new skill or hobby, do that instead of constantly chasing women around. Get a few of them under your belt if you haven’t, but you’ll figure out really quick that sex is like pizza. There’s no such thing as bad pizza, just some are better than others. Same can be said about women. Once you get to sex, it all feels the same pretty much. It only differs by degrees and those degrees are usually slight.

Your friends are more important than your woman. They will be there for you when you fall flat on your face or you get “zeroed out.” And you will get “zeroed out” eventually. Whether emotionally, financially, or otherwise, it will happen. If it doesn’t, you are either extremely lucky, or you haven’t ventured out into the world and taken any risks whatsoever. Don’t fuck up your friendships over a woman, ask me how I know.

Use your voice. I’ve said it before, several times in the past. Somebody has to come along to “carry the torch.” If I’m still here doing this when I’m 60 or older, than I have failed you and I have failed myself. There’s more to life than talking about game, women, and red pill topics. It’s called life itself. And it will blow by you in the blink of an eye. One day you will wake up and you will be 50 and you’ll wonder, “where did all of the time go?” Don’t let that happen to you. Get out and live. Go enjoy the sunshine. Go ride a motorcycle or something. Get off the internet and get out of your house.

I’ve heard some of the guys that I interact with in this particular sphere ask the question, “What happened to all the guys that were here before us? Most of them just disappeared.” That or they died. My take as well as many of the guys that I’ve talked with about this particular question is that our “forefathers” if you will, got what they needed from “this space,” and then went on with their lives. Maybe this is me wanting to get on with my life. I honestly don’t know at this moment.

Be authentic in whatever you do, especially on the internet. Don’t be one of these caricature asshole grifters. If “selling your soul” to make money is the route you go down like they are, I’m pretty sure you will end up broke and dead at the end of that road. And even if you don’t end up broke, you will still end up dead and nobody will have known who you really are. That sounds like a lonely existence to me.

Stop looking for somebody to “save you.” There is no messiah coming. The only one that is going to “save you” is yourself. You are your own messiah.

Stop bending the knee to women just so that you can get some ass. You won’t get it because she won’t respect you or be attracted or aroused by you, so knock it off. You’ll just end up being a simp and nobody wants to be around that, not even women.

I don’t know what it will take for you, because I’m not you, but have some self-respect. If you don’t respect yourself, nobody else will either. That includes women. Especially women. Be willing and able to walk away.

Last thing:

Let Them Burn.

If you don’t know what that means, either you are new, lazy, or just plain old dumb. Go read my blog, it’s in there and all over the place. Stop being a lazy fuck wanting someone to hold your hand and spoon-feed you like a baby bird. Stop looking for shortcuts and “hacks,” because in life there aren’t any shortcuts or “hacks.” You get to do this thing called life the hard way where everybody is keeping score, points matter, participation is mandatory, you’ll probably get less out of it than you put into it, and ultimately nobody gives a fuck whether you live or die. They have their own shit to worry about.

And if you think I’m being pessimistic and negative, all that tells me is that you don’t know me, and you probably never will.

At the end of the day, there’s two ways to look at life:

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Talk to you all soon.

Rob